Porn, is it really that bad?
Matthew 5:28 – But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
2 Timothy 2:22 – Flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.
There’s a big pandemic going around since the rise of the internet. Even more so since the rise of highspeed and smartphones. While social media is addicting and most of us have a difficult time putting down our phones for more than 10 minutes at a time, the issue I’m discussing in this post is pornography.
It has ruined lives, relationships, marriages, jobs and many more things. I’m going to dive into why I see that it’s the only sin I see that breaks all 10 commandments directly (all sins break them, however, I’m going to demonstrate my perspective in this post).
It does not only destroy relationships emotionally and psychologically, it also ruins physically.
Let’s start with the commandments.
You shall have no other gods before me – if you are addicted to porn, it’s your god. You probably desire it more than God
You shall make no idols – you may be idolizing the actors / performers on the screen. Not only are you idolizing them, you probably want to be them.
You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain – if you have any experience watching any at all, the Lord’s name is mentioned on a regular basis in videos.
Keep the Sabbath Holy – when you’re addicted, you don’t wait a specific day to watch. The addiction controls when you watch it.
Honor your father and mother – not many parents would be proud to find out their child is addicted to his. It doesn’t respect parents (especially older folks, they didn’t have access to it like we do now, they were intimate with each other). It also promotes not treating your spouse / partner with respect. You probably hope and desire your partner acts like the performers.
You shall not murder – watching the people on the screen, you are participating in the murder of their real life value. I remember seeing that it’s suspected that 95% of performers are trafficked, threatened to perform and make it look like they enjoy it. Possibly at gun point. One conversation I had with someone, mentioned that many times, not only are the performers threatened, but also the families. If they don’t perform, their families may get hurt.
You shall not commit adultery – as mentioned above, you don’t need to physically commit adultery, but just lusting after them, the offense is committed.
You shall not steal – if you’re not in a committed relationship with your spouse, and you are fantasizing about someone on a screen, you’re essentially stealing the thought of them being with you, or you with them
You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor – Not often, will someone watch that stuff, and be truthful about it.
You shall not covet – if you’re watching, you’re coveting.
I know some of them are a bit of a reach, but the thing we can’t forget is, God’s commandments go deeper than we can ever imagine. So it’s quite possible that I’m not even hitting the deeper meaning of the commandments relating to porn. Suffice to say, it’s a sin and it’s also a spiritual pandemic in which most men have either been addicted to it, or struggled with it for a period of time.
Psychologically, it also affects us because we fantasize about how our spouse should be. Which is a gross misrepresentation of real life. Our partners don’t want to be treated as a toy, item or just a disposable relief piece that we can have any time we want.
They want to be cherished, loved and respected. Those three things are difficult enough in a relationship without the added factor of the fantasy land created by this industry.
When it comes to how our physical bodies react? There has been lots of research showing how the more porn you consume, the more you need to consume and often it has to be more and more extreme just to become aroused.
Many realize after a while, that their spouse doesn’t arouse them anymore. Simply due to the chemical functions in our brains, have been reprogramed so that our spouses are no longer attractive compared to the dopamine hit you get from the screen. I could go much deeper on this, but suffice to say about this one, that if you are addicted to his screen induced fantasy, you may need help.
I have partnered with Covenant Eyes (see my partnership page) for details. I won’t know you read this article, nor will I know you signed up (should you choose to do so). But if you want to quit this devastating addiction, they have fantastic resources and support for anyone struggling.
And last but not least, the cross of Christ offers refuge for anyone realizing exactly how deep this goes. Time is lost, motivation, sex drive, zest for life, relationship goals and many, many other things.
Look to the cross for salvation, and if God doesn’t remove this addiction from your life, reach out to Covenant Eyes. They aren’t there to judge, they just know the difficulty most people have in quitting it, and they offer help.